Qing's blog

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will you do?
--> Betray him back! Wahaha. No lah. Depends on who he is I guess. >.<
2. What will you do if you do not share the same feelings as the person who likes you?
--> Reject him lorr.
3. What will your dream wedding be like?
--> Wahaha. Grand grand! Like a princess'.
4. Are you planning ur future?
--> In terms of career, I guess so?
5. What's your ideal lover's height?
--> 180+!
6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone else?
--> Loving someone.
7. If the person you like does not accept you, would you continue to wait for them to change their feelings?
--> Hmm. Depends on who.
8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, would you wait?
--> Depends on who it is. Like this time is an exception!
9. What do u want most in life?
--> A good career and a happy family I guess?
10. Who is the most important to u now?
--> No one special I guess. Friends lor.
11. What kind of person am I?
--> Good question..
12.If the person you secretly like cannot recognise you, what would you do/how would you react?
--> Hahaha. Don't know. Be emo?
13. Would u be devoted in a relationship?
--> Hmm. I guess so. =/
14. If you fall in love with two persons simultaneously, who would you pick?
--> Depends on who they are.
15. What types of friends u prefer?
--> True ones?

Those 8 people are:
SOPHIE! <3
Alan.
Amelia.
Lynn.
Sarah.
Howe.
Jeff.
YOU! The one reading this! :)

11:50 PM

Happy 21st, loverboy. ♥

Ohman. Everyone's like trying to talk me out of extending it. =/
Maybe they just don't understand what I really want? Think mei's the only one whom I can talk to about all these. OKAY. I know everyone's concerned lah. But trust me, I'm fine and I know what I'm doing. I know when to stop and I won't go overboard one lahhh. :) People! Stop nagging lah k! :))

Have been losing my temper really easily these days. Don't know whether it's the lack of sleep or what. Or maybe it's just my exams. Just don't feel too good, lah.
Threw a huge fit on Wednesday because daddy decided to heed aunt's advice and sell my car away. Argh. I don't see how this makes my life anymore normal than it is now. Like seriously. Other 19 year olds not owning a car doesn't mean that it's not normal to own one lor.
What exactly is that so called normal life she's always talking about anyway? _l_
Trashed my lappy earlier this morning. Was so pissed off cuz sis was screaming nonstop and that sort of woke me up. Decided to grab my lappy and finish typing the rest of my CL stuff and while I was walking downstairs, she started screaming again. Got so ticked I slammed it on the table. Think that's what caused my lcd screen to crack. Arghhhh. 1300+ for the repairs please! How not to spoil my mood for the rest of the week huh. Just sucks you know. So wanna throw more things and break them all. =/
OKAY. And I seriously felt like fuck when daddy came back from KL just now. It's bad enough I trashed another laptop, and now he has to be soooo nice as to get me snacks and stuff from KL. How not to feel guilty ah? And he's being very nice and everything, asking me whether I wanna go over to Aussie to look for bestie and take a break. Ahhhh. Just don't feel good you know!
So I've decided to be a good girl and take in as much students as I can to get my lappy fixed asap and to earn the money myself for the trip to Aussie. :) Gonna keep my fingers crossed that mom would allow me to go too. >.<

I think this entry seriously have zero entertainment value okay. Just purely rantings cuz I really need to get some shits off my chest. And maybe to take my mind off my stupid econs notes too..

~~Why do I feel like shit when I read all those things?~~

1:56 AM

Meant to blog last night but some stuff happened. Anyways, here it is. (:
Extremely random post if I must say so myself.

Happy belated birthday to Ken buddy!
Finally hit the big two-O already, huh.
Well, best wishes to you and everything you do! :)
Hope that our friendship will grow stronger by the years as well okay!
Loves!

Wasn't in the best of moods these two days. Think it's probably cuz I'm having my Law and Econs papers next week. Sigh. Haven't really been in the mood to study at all. Maybe choosing to stay at home wasn't such a good idea afterall..

Anyway, to digress abit..
Had a really nice heart to heart talk with mei a couple of days ago. There are things I don't know how to tell anyone. Not even the ones deemed closest to me. Thanks mei for listening to my rubbish all the time luh. :) Really enjoyed all our crappings and everything. Hee.
Been thinking of extending my sakuras too. Haven't really thought of what else I want at the moment though. Was thinking of butterflies and more sakuras. But I think butterflies and sakuras look weird together, somehow. Ahhh. Don't know lah. I'll just think about it somemore before getting it done I guess. I'm tempted to go to Jordan's with mei this weekend though.. ):

Finally took the time and thought of what I wanted to blog about for Loo's blog. And that somehow prompted me to look for the p3 picture SJ showed me some time ago. Found a small version at first. Sent it to bestie and Loo and we were like trying to figure out how many people we could recognise. Seriously speaking, I wasn't able to recognise many people. Hah. Had a good laugh at the silly things Loo said.
It was nice feeling luh. Being so close to my primary school exclassmates and all. Kinda rare cuz people tend to be closer to their secondary schoolmates instead. Ohwells. Just hope that things will continue this way yup. ^.^

4:35 AM

Got tagged by bestie. So yuppp.. (:

Real name: Sandy Kwa
Nicknames: Qingqing, Hello kitty, etc. Can't remember. =/
Married: Nope!
Male/Female: Female
High school: Christ Church Secondary School, Singapore
College: MDIS
University: University of Bradford
Short or long hair: Long, I guess?
Are u a healthy freak: HAHAHA. No. =/
Height: 165 ):
Do u have a crush on someone?: It's a secret (:
Do u like yourself: I guess so? Haa.
Piercings: Yeap. 11?
Righty of lefty: Righty

First..}
Surgery: Hmmm. Don't think I had any.
Piercing: I think I was about.. 7?! Then it closed and I had it pierced again. =/
Person u see in the morning: LOL. My maid.
Award: Can't remember. Maybe some weird kuku awards in Primary school
Sport you joined: Netball.
Pet: Rabbits & a puppy.
Vacation: Can't remember. =/
Concert: Ahhh. >.<
First crush: Perhaps.. JH? lol.

Currently..}
Eating: Nay.
Drinking: Nothing o.O
I'm about to: have lunch.

Your future..}
Want kids: No thanks.
Want to get married: If I have to.
Careers in mind: ): Auditor perhaps? Piano teacher too I guess. =/
Which is better?}
Lips or eyes?: Eyes.
Hugs or kisses: Hugs.
Shorter or taller?: Taller!
Romantic or spontaneous: Spontaneous for me. (:
Sensitive or loud: Sensitive.
Troublemaker or hesitant?: Troublemaker! :)

Have u ever..}
Kissed a stranger?: Nope.
Drank bubbles: =/
Lost glasses/contacts: Nay.
Ran away from home: Nah. I'm a good girl. -angelic.
liked someone younger: HAHAHA. =X
liked someone older: Yeah.
Broke someone's heart: Don't know?
Cried when someone died: Yes.

Do u believe in..}
Yourself?: I guess so?
Miracles: Sometimes..
Heaven: Hmm.
Santa Claus: No.
Magic: Nope.
Angels: =/

Answer truthfully..}
Is there someone you want to be with right now?: Yeap. Someone... ):
Do u believe in God?: Hmm..

Tag 5 people:
PEILING. :)
Alan.
Howe.
Jieying.
& Sophie!

1:59 PM

Enjoy! :)

}you'll never walk alone. -CL win @ istanbul.

}when you walk through a storm, hold your head up high.

}who the fk are ~~mancs~~? :)

}torres tribute<3

}& last but not least, the awesomely cute torres song. :)

His armband proved he was a red, Torres Torres
You'll never walk alone it said, Torres Torres
We bought the lad from sunny Spain
He gets the ball, he scores again,
Fernando Torres, Liverpool's number 9
Nanana~ Nanana~ Nanana~
Fernando Torres, Liverpool's number 9!

2:39 AM

WHATTHEFUCK?! ):

It was almost painful to watch the Mancs-Pool match just now.
First Rob Styles, and now Steve Bennett. Who next then?
Why is the EPL filled with so many brainless referees who make absolutely retarded decisions that ruins the game?

A yellow for speaking to a ref? You're having a laugh.

Just the fact that he already had a weak yellow and appeared quite restrained in his conversion with 'Sir Bennett' negates any legitimacy to the call. If that's the case, Rooney should have been suspended from the league for life by now.
The show must go on with all the revisionist rule writing one can fathom. Get creative, fellars.

-Anfieldbanter-

Yes, I understand the need to protect refs better after the Ashley Cole incident. But is it necessary for the ref to award a yellow card for such trivial matters? Seriously, I don't see how 2 yellow cards would be awarded that easily.
And for Nando? Oh please. If a yellow card could be award to Masch for such a weak tackle, anyone would argue that the Mancs players should be booked for the fouls they committed as well. Total bullshit. I seriously think Steve Bennett should be suspended for his poor judgement and arrogance until he knows how to referee a game properly. =/
Sigh. Hope that things will get better for 'Pool in time and that Nando will be fit enough for the next two weeks.. ):

& of course not forgetting Sakuranotoki's post.

2:26 AM

Sigh. ):
I totally screwed up my Finance paper yesterday. Despite staying up to study the remaining uncertain theory parts till 5am and then rushing to school at 11 to meet up with the guys to clear up some stuff, it's still useless. The paper was like, so alien to me, lah. I never had much problems tackling all the calculation questions before so I was pretty confident. And thus, I pretty much focused on the theory parts only for the past week. Turned out that I wasn't able to do the theory parts at all. Lets just say I bullshitted all the way for this paper. :(

Went home to drop my books off and wash up abit before heading out again to meet Alan for dinner. Heh. Sorry I was late! :)

Had our dinner at Breeks Cafe. And somehow. I kept thinking of A lorrr. :(
Didn't do much after dinner 'cept roaming around cwp and taking a few pics here and there.

Went down to Admiralty to meet up with Ling cuz I seriously haven't seen that girl in ages. Slacked and just talked about random stuff.
Left at about 11 if I remembered correctly. Being the blur queen that I was, I forgot Alan lost his keys and kept asking him to stay for awhile more. Haa. Sorry lahhh. Moreover I was on the phone, and I seriously can't multitask for nuts lor. =/
Anyways. Took the train back to CCK with him since I'll have a direct bus home from BP anwyay. Cabbed home in the end cuz I think there weren't any bus left at that time. Heh. Didn't reach home that late afterall but aunt was making a big fuss for nothing. Sighhh. I seriously dread having to see her nowadays. >.< Cousins weren't able to do much cuz she wouldn't stop talking anyway. Ohwells. Can someone help catch Mas Selamat soon so I can travel back and forth everyday and not stay there anymore? :(
Spent the rest of the night chatting with cousins till 3. Came back to JB earlier in the afternoon and spent the rest of my day at home watching anime.

OKAY.
I seriously need my sleep lah.
Think I'll continue blogging about some other random stuff tmr.
And I need to think of something to blog about for Loo's guest of honour post.
Yepyep, thanks for inviting me to be a GOH for your blog! :)

3:31 AM

BOOs.

I hate exams. They make me insomniac everytime. ):

On a lighter note, my Accounts paper went pretty well on Monday. Special thanks to Hydee and Ming for coming to school early to help me revise. (:
I actually felt afraid of doing badly for the first time. My theories were totally screwed up because I haven't had the slightest idea as to where I should start studying from. Guess that's the consequence for missing too many lectures..
Thank God the important parts that Hydee told me to read really came out and I was able to answer them. And I was appalled that the weightage of the theory part is more than that of the calculation. It's an Accounts paper, for crying out loud. I did not take Accounting and Finance to memorise a bunch of weird theories lahhh. >.< The reason why I chose A&F was because I hated theories and I usually pretty much screw up because I was never able to memorise them.
Ahhh wells. All I hope now is that there isn't much theory parts for tmr's FM paper. :)

Ling is sooo evil. Keep bullying WX. ):

3:39 AM

Dear A,
I miss you.
So much I can't concentrate on my studies.
It's seriously not a good time for you to be messing with my head now.
Cuz I really really need to study lor.
So, pretty please, can you like, get outta my head now so that I can study?

Love, Qing.

2:07 AM

There are days when I regret it
The things I said to you
I put my trust in no one
It broke my heart and I blamed it on you
You were kind and oh so gentle
But I refused to see
That someone like you existed
I was somewhere in denial
While you were loving me

I cried myself to sleep last night
When I woke up
There were tear stains on my pillow
It hurt so much to sacrifice what I gave up
Without you in my life
I will always feel lonely
Losing the love
From someone like you

Not a day goes by without something
Reminding me of you
The truth is that I miss you
It gets so hard not being with you
There are times when I go crazy
In the twilight of the night
How I long to be your woman again
There's pain that I hold
That will not let me go

I cried myself to sleep last night
When I woke up
There were tear stains on my pillow
It hurt so much to sacrifice what I gave up
Without you in my life
I will always feel lonely
Losing the love
From someone like you

I don't wanna make this too hard
But I just wanna be where you are
In your life, by your side, forever

I cried myself to sleep last night
When I woke up
There were tear stains on my pillow
It hurt so much to sacrifice what I gave up
Without you in my life
I will always feel lonely
Losing the love
From someone like you

I admit I miss you.
I can't help it.
But I won't deny I'm pissed off with you too.
What is so good about that sneaky rat anyway?
She's ugly, stupid and a total slut.
It's disappointing, really.
Sometimes I really think about the reasons you have for choosing her.
Is it because of the fact that I pushed you away whilst she's a total whore who wouldn't mind throwing herself at you?

Anyhoos, whatever reason it is, I don't think I really want to know anymore.
All I can say is that, I think that it's a horribly bad choice to choose her over ME.
Then again, it's your choice, your loss. :)

2:10 AM

RAWR.

It's weird that I'm feeling so awake now cuz I woke up at like, 0330 last night to watch the Inter-Pool game. I'm usually fine with being awake at this time since my normal sleeping time's at 3. =/
But tonight's different lahhh. I need to sleep like, NOW? Daddy will seriously flip if I'm not able to wake up tmr morning, again. Sighhh. I'm seriously so gonna curse and swear tmr if I were to wake up and travel all the way to Desaru, only to have it rain the whole day. But then again, seeing how fking horrible today's weather is, I don't expect too much. :(

ANYWAY! I actually managed to stay awake for the whole match last night. I'd usually fall asleep halfway cuz it's too boring. Or rather, it only happens to matches that are played at like, 3am here? Ohwells. It was a good game. And Nando is hot and awesome as usual. >.< It was a great win lah. Thank God I didn't wake up to watch it for nothing.. :)

OHOHOH! Nando won the player of the month award for Febuary! Hee :)

I felt so bad when you told me about the bill, but something inside felt even worst at the thought of cutting off our last form of communication when I'm in JB. Maybe it's just selfish thinking on my part but have you ever thought that it'd be even worst next month because you'll be gone for so long?

1:35 AM

Had a really awful day.
Shall not go into details but all I can say is that amidst all of these, mom and dad's relationship seem to have gotten stronger.
So, yupyup, maybe all these happened for a reason.. ت

Thanks Ben for being there for me again this time. (:

1:10 AM

BOOs!

Meant to update but was feeling really unwell the past two days. >:(
But I'm feeling so much better now though. (:
Anyhoos, I finally got my tatt done on Thursday. Mei was supposed to go with me but because of some unforseen circumstances, she was unable to make it. Heh. But nevermind! It was a pretty good experience to do it on my own. But seriously, I was undeniably nervous beforehand. Heh. Surprisingly, it didn't hurt as much as I expected it to, though. Ohwells. Sandy's been a brave girl! -claps- :D

I've been watching quite a number of older Korean dramas of late. Namely My girl, which I'm watching for the third time, and My lovely Samsoon, which I haven't had the chance to watch it properly until now. :)

I don't know why, but watching them brings back memories of A. Happy memories of course. But, I don't really like it cuz it'd just make me emo lahhh.
There are moments when part of me still believe that it's just temporary insanity on his part when he chose rat over me. But to think about it, this temporary insanity has been for a couple of months already. And somehow, I realised that I have to snap out of this craziness and face reality soon. When better to do it than now right?
For nearly three months, the only person I go out with is him. It's amazing how I can meet him 3-4 days a week and not get bored of it. And not to mention that we pretty much do the same thing everytime we meet. It's just lunch, shopping, dinner, movie then have some drinks before heading home. It's just like a routine.. None of us expected anything because we started going out as normal friends. But as time goes by, I find myself falling for this silly guy whom would comply to whatever that I ask of him. The relationship have been nothing but simple. Be it just hanging out at his place playing the piano, we just enjoy it all. We were so used to each other's presence that we felt uneasy after not meeting up for only 3 days. I felt like such a pampered little princess when I'm with him because he takes such care of me. There wasn't anything we couldn't talk to each other about. It's just like a fantasy lah.
Like I said, it's just like fantasy and fantasy means it's unreal. Somehow the reason why things ended was pretty much cuz of the appearance of rat. But, our last date was also the best date we had.
I was supposed to go over to his place after tutoring but I decided to meet him at night instead. We met up at the night safari as agreed and went in. As usual, he paid for the entrance fee while I get him something in return. I got Ben and Jerry's before heading in and in the midst of walking in, he suddenly stopped and fed me. It was a feeling I couldn't describe. Just, pure happiness I guess. Spent the night over at the night safari before we headed back to his place with the intention of using the piano. He fell asleep instead and we just spent the night in his room. Not gonna go into detail but lets just say this much valued relationship ended with a kiss.

Anyway, here's some pretty nice and emo songs I wanna share. Hee. Just some songs that remind me of him.. :(

Dear A,
I miss you. And I miss the times we spent together. Although they weren't anything special, but I still love every minute of it. Pure simple dating, and not to mention being pampered by you. Just so you know, you're the first person I think of whenever I'm down. Part of me still wished that you'll be there to hug me when I cry, and tell me it's alright because I have you. But time and again, you disappoint me.
Do you know? That I had mixed feelings that night when you hugged me while I cried?
I felt so safe, yet I'm afraid. I was so afraid that if you were to choose rat over me, I would fall because I lost my support.
You made me so dependent on you that even up till now, I'm still trying to get used to being alone. But, thank you for making me stronger though.
Well, darling, I hope that one day, you'll look back and regret that you chose rat over me. :)

Love, Qing.

11:21 PM

Why do I feel a pang of jealousy when you told me that you'll be out with your friends?
Even though you kept updating me on your whereabouts, I somehow feel insecure. :(

I'll blog properly tmr, I promise! I'm just too sick to think now...

~~}& i just can't help feeling upset at the thought of you going off to some kuku country for more than 2 freaking weeks in april.~~
~~rawrrr. don't go don't go! i take back what i said about me being unaffected if my boy were to go overseas. i'll be so lonelyyy lah! -cries! >:(~~

11:19 PM

Pictures pictures! :)

They're horribly taken though. >.<

8:31 PM

OH NO! ):

I'm like, having fever all of a sudden lahhh.
Rawr! Why why why!
I'm not liking this at all... ):

6:58 AM

RAWRRR. =/

I've been slacking so much these two days I'm lazy to even update my blog.
Ohwells. Been thinking alot about the design I want but I haven't really made a decision till just now. I hope I won't change my mind again lahhh. I've gone from 3 hearts to a star then a snowflake, & back to a heart again before I decided on cherry blossom(s). Heh. Thanks to Tiffy who gave me the idea. :) But the thing now is that I can't decide whether I want one or three. Been pondering alot lah. Think mei's got a headache from all my asking & having to help me look through all the designs I've found. Hee. Thanks darling Sophie! ♥
Anyway, this is where I got my cherry blossom from! :)

So pretty huh! Ohman. Seriously speaking, I can't wait to see the end results already lahhh. So.. Can I fast forward today & go straight to tmr since there isn't anything interesting between now & tmr evening. >.<
Anyhoos! Here's another pretty pretty tatt design I found! It's too big for my hand though, considering it have to be pretty detailed. :(

Aww. Maybe I'll get this done the next time.. Hee on my ankle perhaps? Rawrrrr.

Ohwells. Really appreciative of friends who keep asking me to think properly. I've really decided I want to get it done this time lor. I mean. I've been talking about getting inked for like at least 1-2 years? It's time I really thought about it and get it done lor. It's not like those spur of the moment kind of thing lahhh. Hee. Thankful for all the care and concern lah people! ♥

11:19 PM

HELLOOOO. :)

I've decided to abandon my old blog & use this one instead till I get things sorted out. Though I don't think it's anytime soon cuz I'd very much rather focus on my exams than those stupid problems. (:
Anyway! I've decided to get my handpiece done by the end of this week. Was extremely depressed at first because I couldn't find anyone trustworthy enough to do it. But, thank God Sophie & Sarah had some contacts! :) So, I've decided to go ahead with mei's cuz she just had hers done not too long ago and it looked pretty great, from the rather small picture I saw lahhh.
Got the contact number of the studio from mei earlier today & called up the place to make an appointment. So, yupyup! I die die also gonna get it done by the end of the week. The problem's that the price's rather steep for a small handpiece lahhh. Maybe he misunderstood me during the phone conversation? Haa sure do hope so lah! >.< mei's going with me as she wants to do a touch up & maybe an extention? But that silly girl haven't decided on it & have yet to make an appointment lahhh. =/
Rawrrrrs. Ohwell. I was actually pondering about whether I should do the handpiece first because mom would seriously murder me when she sees it. Well, I don't expect anything lesser than her blowing her top & screaming at me, considering her reaction when she saw me with that nose piercing 3 years ago. Haiyooo. But then again, the only other place I'd like to get inked at the moment is behind my ear lahhh. Hmm, maybe a teensy star there would be better for now? I would seriously need more time to convince my mom. & not to forget that it doesn't heal in 1-2 days, which also mean I can't practice my pianooo. >:(
Howhowhow? Suggestions anyone? Should I get my handpiece done first? Or should I get one behind my ear first? Sighhhh.

2:31 AM